So last night we had the talk about who is staying, who is going, who gets what, who needs what. It was a surreally calm affair. No doubt an undercurrent of emotion but mostly we agreed it just felt weird. Mostly I am just glad decisions are being made that will benefit the both of us. I want her to be happy, she is good people. I want her to be healthy, happy, and progressive in her life so she can find something truly rewarding and someone truly deserving.
We both agreed that we had different visions and concepts regarding where this was going and what we wanted and somewhere over the last year we fell not only form the same page, but as it turns out, we were reading different books.
I will be staying in the apartment, she will be looking, she will take whatever it is she needs without leaving me stranded. We decided on what amicably. I will need to get a microwave, a loveseat, and a toaster or toaster oven. I will build her a computer, give her the DVD player, etc. The kitchen stuff will get split down the middle, and she gets the AC unit and well, it goes on... it is all very mundane. It is all material and strangely unimportant and at the same time it is very important to me that she take whatever it is she needs to be comfortable, even if it means sacrificing my own comfort. Part of that is probably guilt, but more so it is because I know I can manage at any comfort level, I have lived at a lot of different stages of comfort and I know I will eventually find peace with whatever I have or don't have.
I could however, use some advice on some spiritual cleansing for both myself and the apartment. Send it my way if you can =)
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10 - 59 Stanley Street
Kingston, ON, K7K 1Y2
Reshuffle the furniture...as much of it as you can. Small changes can make everything look new and diferent. Don't forget smell. Buy new soap, shampoo, incense...but don't use any of it till after everything is moved and settled.love you.
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